I’m Back 😏
Sooo… needless to say it’s been a while.
Brevity has never been my strong suit; I’ll do my best to keep this on the shorter side of lengthy. But basically this post is about why I stopped posting, what’s delayed me in returning, and what (I think) I’m going to do now.
Why I left- I didn’t have a firm grip on what I wanted this blog to be about. Yes, my homepage reads “FASHION | BEAUTY | LIFESTYLE”, but that’s such a catch-all statement. I never dedicated any real time into figuring out how I wanted to convey those things. My published posts were a start, but they all felt like jumbled ideas in my head. That didn’t make my intentions any less genuine, but I didn’t have an understanding of what I wanted to produce. This blog started off with me chronicling my pandemic room updates and online shopping, then transitioned to skincare and product advice that no one asked for 😂. All of which is fine, but it started to feel like I was just on here reviewing products 🤷🏾♀️. Boring. Not interested.
Why I stopped- I couldn’t get it together, yal 🙄. I honestly couldn’t figure out what I wanted to say on here. Believe it or not, I have seven almost complete drafts, all of which were written between Aug ’20 and March ’21. I looked them over before starting on this post, could see that I put quite a bit of work into them, but ultimately I was unsatisfied and never posted them. It felt like another rendition of the same thing I’ve seen somewhere else. I know there’s nothing new under the sun, but I needed my work to feel like me at the very least. So, I stopped writing in order to regroup and discover what I wanted my site to look like, feel like, and say.
What’s delayed me- Whelp… I never came up with an answer 😂. Taking time to think has led to almost two years without posting and me having another (albeit costly) thing that I don’t really do on my list. Long story short, I’m just another person that suffers from imposter syndrome and a lack of confidence, all stemming from an extremely bad case of perfectionism. That’s done nothing, but stunt my growth and while I’m fully aware of that fact, I haven’t been able to stop it. I’d always say that things don’t have to be perfect, but the standard I set for myself was staggeringly high. I gave myself no grace, which consistently discredited all my attempts. I hated that for me.
What I’m going to do now- At this point, I’ve realized that I’m so lost that there’s no sense in waiting for a defined path. I just need to start walking and make adjustments as necessary. Progression, not perfection 😌. I have all the encouraging and constructive feedback for everyone else, but I never have any of it for myself. So now, I’m focusing on giving myself the chance to grow. That means a few things:
- All seven of them drafts finna be posted ’cause work was done and we ain’t finna continue the disrespect by ignoring that! 😂 I’ll list the original date at the start of the text.
- I’ll be a bit more active on my IG, especially over the next month. I want to highlight some trips I’ve taken as well as share some style tips and looks. I may even finally share the photos from the shoot I did for this website haha.
- Until I figure out my direction, my posts will be about whatever I feel like sharing. I won’t continue squashing my thoughts and ideas just because they lack novelty. Hell, I may be the only one to ever read these posts, period! But that’s honestly ok, because I know how proud of myself I’ll be when I come back and read them years down the line ☺️.
So, that’s that. Here’s my third attempt at this journey and I believe it’s going to be my most fruitful one yet.
Love this and you! Super proud! Let’s get it Duh-kneel!